hello john its been a very tuff week for me ... shazs has been nasty again so wats new there wen she is on the drink ... she will appoligies to me but john ihave change now no/1 is goint to trat me like a door mat no more .... john i have to tell u sme thing ... its been eat ng me up for nearlly 7/months wen u went up to heaven i felt so guilty i blamed my self for u going as i was on my lap/top ply ng my bubblu know i es and u said u would have five min s to catch ur breath ... but u did nt want me to get in a panic but u went happy with a smile on ur face and u want d u to rember me dace ng ... not shear panic in my face i know id did not let u die so john u can now rest in peace u know i will b fine now ... now inside i feel love not hate any more